humor

humor

The nice part about being a pessimist is that you are constantly being either proven right or pleasantly surprised.

The nice part about being a pessimist is that you are constantly being either proven right or pleasantly surprised.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

We're playing Scrabble. It's a nightmare.""Scrabble?" He sounds surprised. "Scrabble's great.""Not when you're playing with a family of geniuses, it's not. They all put words like 'iridiums'. And I put 'pig'.

We're playing Scrabble. It's a nightmare.""Scrabble?" He sounds surprised. "Scrabble's great.""Not when you're playing with a family of geniuses, it's not. They all put words like 'iridiums'. And I put 'pig'.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

A dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest.

A dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Since I don't smoke, I decided to grow a mustache - it is better for the health.However, I always carried a jewel-studded cigarette case in which, instead of tobacco, were carefully placed several mustaches, Adolphe Menjou style. I offered them politely to my friends: "Mustache? Mustache? Mustache?"Nobody dared to touch them. This was my test regarding the sacred aspect of mustaches.

Since I don't smoke, I decided to grow a mustache - it is better for the health.However, I always carried a jewel-studded cigarette case in which, instead of tobacco, were carefully placed several mustaches, Adolphe Menjou style. I offered them politely to my friends: "Mustache? Mustache? Mustache?"Nobody dared to touch them. This was my test regarding the sacred aspect of mustaches.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Geez, you guys. I know I'm popular and all, but seriously, you're a bit too co-dependent for me. I'm going to need you to step away from my personal bubble." A wispy vine-woman curled ivy tendrils around his arm, and he sliced through them with his dagger. "No! Bad Wraith! No touchie!

Geez, you guys. I know I'm popular and all, but seriously, you're a bit too co-dependent for me. I'm going to need you to step away from my personal bubble." A wispy vine-woman curled ivy tendrils around his arm, and he sliced through them with his dagger. "No! Bad Wraith! No touchie!

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

If it weren't for greed, intolerance, hate, passion and murder, you would have no works of art, no great buildings, no medical science, no Mozart, no Van Gough, no Muppets and no Louis Armstrong.

If it weren't for greed, intolerance, hate, passion and murder, you would have no works of art, no great buildings, no medical science, no Mozart, no Van Gough, no Muppets and no Louis Armstrong.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Chocolate is God's apology for brocolli

Chocolate is God's apology for brocolli

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Dance like it hurts. Love like you need money. Work when people are watching. -- Dogbert's Motto

Dance like it hurts. Love like you need money. Work when people are watching. -- Dogbert's Motto

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

A successful book is not made of what is in it, but what is left out of it.

A successful book is not made of what is in it, but what is left out of it.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I have a new philosophy. I'm only going to dread one day at a time.

I have a new philosophy. I'm only going to dread one day at a time.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Better a witty fool, than a foolish wit.

Better a witty fool, than a foolish wit.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Hello Dad! It is now three in the morning. Do you know where I am?

Hello Dad! It is now three in the morning. Do you know where I am?

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

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