humor

humor

To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up.

To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

If ruining the only religious icon I have leaves me vulnerable to Martian vampires, I'll have to risk it.

If ruining the only religious icon I have leaves me vulnerable to Martian vampires, I'll have to risk it.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I have to return some videotapes

I have to return some videotapes

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

You're an investigator - can't nobody find stuff out like a woman. Y'all put the police to shame, make the little investigative tricks they show on CSI and Law & Order: SVU look like counting lessons on Sesame Street.

You're an investigator - can't nobody find stuff out like a woman. Y'all put the police to shame, make the little investigative tricks they show on CSI and Law & Order: SVU look like counting lessons on Sesame Street.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Every year, many, many stupid people graduate from college. And if they can do it, so can you.

Every year, many, many stupid people graduate from college. And if they can do it, so can you.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

If you say ‘we’re in this together,’ I’m going to hurl.

If you say ‘we’re in this together,’ I’m going to hurl.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

What do you think they're going to do to us when they find us guilty?" she says after a few minutes of silence have passed."Honestly?""Does now seem like the time for honesty?"I look at her from the corner of my eye. "I think they're going to force us to eat lots of cake and then take an unreasonably long nap.

What do you think they're going to do to us when they find us guilty?" she says after a few minutes of silence have passed."Honestly?""Does now seem like the time for honesty?"I look at her from the corner of my eye. "I think they're going to force us to eat lots of cake and then take an unreasonably long nap.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

If you didn't grow up like I did then you don't know, and if you don't know it's probably better you don't judge.

If you didn't grow up like I did then you don't know, and if you don't know it's probably better you don't judge.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Because teachers, no matter how kind, no matter how friendly, are sadistic and evil to the core.

Because teachers, no matter how kind, no matter how friendly, are sadistic and evil to the core.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

It is a damn poor mind that can think of only one way to spell a word.

It is a damn poor mind that can think of only one way to spell a word.

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

So. You get handed a holy sword by an archangel, told to go fight the forces of evil, and you somehow remain an atheist. Is that what you're saying?

So. You get handed a holy sword by an archangel, told to go fight the forces of evil, and you somehow remain an atheist. Is that what you're saying?

Jul 05, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

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