humor

humor

If I can get you to laugh with me, you like me better, which makes you more open to my ideas. And if I can persuade you to laugh at the particular point I make, by laughing at it you acknowledge its truth.

If I can get you to laugh with me, you like me better, which makes you more open to my ideas. And if I can persuade you to laugh at the particular point I make, by laughing at it you acknowledge its truth.

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I don't want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their job.

I don't want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their job.

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.

I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

If I have to move up in a building, I choose the elevator over the escalator. Because one time I was riding the escalator and I tripped. I fell down the stairs for an hour and a half.

If I have to move up in a building, I choose the elevator over the escalator. Because one time I was riding the escalator and I tripped. I fell down the stairs for an hour and a half.

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don't know one child with a full time job and children.

Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don't know one child with a full time job and children.

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner and a loser at the same time.

Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner and a loser at the same time.

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Born again?! No, I'm not. Excuse me for getting it right the first time.

Born again?! No, I'm not. Excuse me for getting it right the first time.

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

On average, drug prisoners spend more time in federal prison than rapists, who often get out on early release because of the overcrowding in prison caused by the Drug War.

On average, drug prisoners spend more time in federal prison than rapists, who often get out on early release because of the overcrowding in prison caused by the Drug War.

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand.

The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand.

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Y'know, you can't please all the people all the time... and last night, all those people were at my show.

Y'know, you can't please all the people all the time... and last night, all those people were at my show.

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'

Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.

Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.

Jul 09, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

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