humor

humor

When you get a thing the way you want it, leave it alone.

When you get a thing the way you want it, leave it alone.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

When something needs to be said, you look for a man to say it. But when something needs actually to be done, you look for a woman.

When something needs to be said, you look for a man to say it. But when something needs actually to be done, you look for a woman.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I am charging you with the protection of my mother and friends, not to mention keeping my younger self off the Internet. He is as dangerous as Opal.

I am charging you with the protection of my mother and friends, not to mention keeping my younger self off the Internet. He is as dangerous as Opal.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

You look disappointed to see me, Zach," Macey teased. "Don't you like my jacket?

You look disappointed to see me, Zach," Macey teased. "Don't you like my jacket?

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I let out a laugh that sounded more like the yip of a startled poodle. "Superp-powers? I wish. My powers aren't winning me a slot on the Cartoon Network anytime soon... except as a comic relief. Ghost Whisperer Junior. Or Ghost Screamer, more like it. Tune in, every week, as Chloe Saunders runs screaming from yet another ghost looking for her help."Okay, superpower might be pushing it.

I let out a laugh that sounded more like the yip of a startled poodle. "Superp-powers? I wish. My powers aren't winning me a slot on the Cartoon Network anytime soon... except as a comic relief. Ghost Whisperer Junior. Or Ghost Screamer, more like it. Tune in, every week, as Chloe Saunders runs screaming from yet another ghost looking for her help."Okay, superpower might be pushing it.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

She frowned at me. "You need some rest. You look like hell. And you're obviously tired enough to have gotten the giggles."Wizards don't giggle," I said, hardly able to speak. "This is cackling.

She frowned at me. "You need some rest. You look like hell. And you're obviously tired enough to have gotten the giggles."Wizards don't giggle," I said, hardly able to speak. "This is cackling.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Ford carried on counting quietly. This is about the most aggressive thing you can do to a computer, the equivalent of going up to a human being and saying "Blood...blood...blood...blood...

Ford carried on counting quietly. This is about the most aggressive thing you can do to a computer, the equivalent of going up to a human being and saying "Blood...blood...blood...blood...

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Ceres wanted a united front in the plant war.""The plant war," Percy said. "You're going to arm all the little grapes with tiny assault rifles?

Ceres wanted a united front in the plant war.""The plant war," Percy said. "You're going to arm all the little grapes with tiny assault rifles?

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Tarzan-like men are my weakness, apparently.

Tarzan-like men are my weakness, apparently.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

It usually takes me two or three days to prepare an impromptu speech.

It usually takes me two or three days to prepare an impromptu speech.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I disapprove of matrimony as a matter of principle.... Why should any independent, intelligent female choose to subject herself to the whims and tyrannies of a husband? I assure you, I have yet to meet a man as sensible as myself! (Amelia Peabody)

I disapprove of matrimony as a matter of principle.... Why should any independent, intelligent female choose to subject herself to the whims and tyrannies of a husband? I assure you, I have yet to meet a man as sensible as myself! (Amelia Peabody)

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Men don’t realize that if we’re sleeping with them on the first date, we’re probably not interested in seeing them again either.

Men don’t realize that if we’re sleeping with them on the first date, we’re probably not interested in seeing them again either.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

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