humor

humor

Bad news, Harry. I've just been to see Professor McGonagall about the Firebolt. She – er, got a bit shirty with me. Told me I'd got my priorities wrong. Seemed to think I cared more about winning the Cup than I do about staying alive. Just because I told her I didn't care if it threw you off, as long as you caught the Snitch first.

Bad news, Harry. I've just been to see Professor McGonagall about the Firebolt. She – er, got a bit shirty with me. Told me I'd got my priorities wrong. Seemed to think I cared more about winning the Cup than I do about staying alive. Just because I told her I didn't care if it threw you off, as long as you caught the Snitch first.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.

Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I may not be smart enough to do everything, but I am dumb enough to try anything.

I may not be smart enough to do everything, but I am dumb enough to try anything.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I’ve been drunk for about a week now, and I thought it might sober me up to sit in a library.

I’ve been drunk for about a week now, and I thought it might sober me up to sit in a library.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Perhaps I can stay by the fire and mend your socks and scream if I hear any strange noises.

Perhaps I can stay by the fire and mend your socks and scream if I hear any strange noises.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

The house smelled musty and damp, and a little sweet, as if it were haunted by the ghosts of long-dead cookies.

The house smelled musty and damp, and a little sweet, as if it were haunted by the ghosts of long-dead cookies.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre and that I am therefore excused from saving universes.

My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre and that I am therefore excused from saving universes.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Almost everything strange washes up near Miami.

Almost everything strange washes up near Miami.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

You're Hell's Angels, then? What chapter are you from?''REVELATIONS. CHAPTER SIX.

You're Hell's Angels, then? What chapter are you from?''REVELATIONS. CHAPTER SIX.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

This book was written using 100% recycled words.

This book was written using 100% recycled words.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.

I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

That was the funniest thing I'd heard in days.You're kidding, right? PLEASE tell me you have a stronger motive for me than 'fair is fair.' Life isn't FAIR, Dean....Nothing is fair, EVER. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. I need to help you because FAIR IS FAIR? Try, 'I need you to help me so I won't rip out your spine and beat you with it.' I MIGHT respond to that. MAYBE.

That was the funniest thing I'd heard in days.You're kidding, right? PLEASE tell me you have a stronger motive for me than 'fair is fair.' Life isn't FAIR, Dean....Nothing is fair, EVER. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. I need to help you because FAIR IS FAIR? Try, 'I need you to help me so I won't rip out your spine and beat you with it.' I MIGHT respond to that. MAYBE.

Jul 04, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

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