humor

humor

But with dogs, we do have "bad dog." Bad dog exists. "Bad dog! Bad dog! Stole a biscuit, bad dog!" The dog is saying, "Who are you to judge me? You human beings who’ve had genocide, war against people of different creeds, colors, religions, and I stole a biscuit?! Is that a crime? People of the world!""Well, if you put it that way, I think you’ve got a point. Have another biscuit, sorry.

But with dogs, we do have "bad dog." Bad dog exists. "Bad dog! Bad dog! Stole a biscuit, bad dog!" The dog is saying, "Who are you to judge me? You human beings who’ve had genocide, war against people of different creeds, colors, religions, and I stole a biscuit?! Is that a crime? People of the world!""Well, if you put it that way, I think you’ve got a point. Have another biscuit, sorry.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Ask any guy if sex is important in a relationship and the one who says no is lying. I just haven't met that guy yet. When you meet him, let's get him in to the Smithsonian - he's that special and rare.

Ask any guy if sex is important in a relationship and the one who says no is lying. I just haven't met that guy yet. When you meet him, let's get him in to the Smithsonian - he's that special and rare.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

If reassurances could dull pain, nobody would ever go to the trouble of pressing grapes.

If reassurances could dull pain, nobody would ever go to the trouble of pressing grapes.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the mistletoe.

Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the mistletoe.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

A big leather-bound volume makes an ideal razorstrap. A thing book is useful to stick under a table with a broken caster to steady it. A large, flat atlas can be used to cover a window with a broken pane. And a thick, old-fashioned heavy book with a clasp is the finest thing in the world to throw at a noisy cat.

A big leather-bound volume makes an ideal razorstrap. A thing book is useful to stick under a table with a broken caster to steady it. A large, flat atlas can be used to cover a window with a broken pane. And a thick, old-fashioned heavy book with a clasp is the finest thing in the world to throw at a noisy cat.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

When I grow up, I'd like to be dangerous.

When I grow up, I'd like to be dangerous.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

My beard grows down to my toes,I never wears no clothes,I wraps my hairAround my bare,And down the road I goes.

My beard grows down to my toes,I never wears no clothes,I wraps my hairAround my bare,And down the road I goes.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

A dysfunctional family is any family with more than one person in it.

A dysfunctional family is any family with more than one person in it.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

You don't need a search warrant to go through someone's trash. Seriously. Once it hits the curb it is totally fair game-you an look it up.

You don't need a search warrant to go through someone's trash. Seriously. Once it hits the curb it is totally fair game-you an look it up.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Principled hate is a hell of a lot stronger than "Boy, I wish you hadn't mummified me and thrown me into the lake" hate.

Principled hate is a hell of a lot stronger than "Boy, I wish you hadn't mummified me and thrown me into the lake" hate.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Mulling this over, Vlad wiped her lip gloss from his lips with the back of his hand.Vampires, after all, didn't sparkle.

Mulling this over, Vlad wiped her lip gloss from his lips with the back of his hand.Vampires, after all, didn't sparkle.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Which of us is happy in this world? Which of us has his desire? or, having it, is satisfied?

Which of us is happy in this world? Which of us has his desire? or, having it, is satisfied?

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

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