humor

humor

Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer."]

Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer."]

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

There are two kinds of people in this world: Those who believe there are two kinds of people in this world and those who are smart enough to know better.

There are two kinds of people in this world: Those who believe there are two kinds of people in this world and those who are smart enough to know better.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

It's my turn to see you through,' she whispers, coming back to me and wrapping me in her blanket as I lose my shit all over again. She holds me until I recover my Y chromosome.

It's my turn to see you through,' she whispers, coming back to me and wrapping me in her blanket as I lose my shit all over again. She holds me until I recover my Y chromosome.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

A few seconds after he stepped out into the hallway and closed the door behind him, there was a fleshly smack and then Andrew yelling, “Ouch. What in the hell was that for?” “Your timing sucks on an epic level,” Daemon shot back.

A few seconds after he stepped out into the hallway and closed the door behind him, there was a fleshly smack and then Andrew yelling, “Ouch. What in the hell was that for?” “Your timing sucks on an epic level,” Daemon shot back.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals, I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants.

I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals, I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it.

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

It is perfectly monstrous,' he said, at last, 'the way people go about nowadays saying things against one behind one's back that are absolutely and entirely true.

It is perfectly monstrous,' he said, at last, 'the way people go about nowadays saying things against one behind one's back that are absolutely and entirely true.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Bones has always been smart," I muttered. "His intelligence was just camouflaged under a mountain of p**sy."Cat

Bones has always been smart," I muttered. "His intelligence was just camouflaged under a mountain of p**sy."Cat

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Are you there vodka? It's me, Chelsea. Please get me out of jail and I promise I will never drink again. Drink and drive. I will never drink and drive again. I may even start my own group fashioned after MADD, Mothers Against Drunk Driving, but I'll call it AWLTDASH, Alcoholics Who Like to Drink and Stay Home.

Are you there vodka? It's me, Chelsea. Please get me out of jail and I promise I will never drink again. Drink and drive. I will never drink and drive again. I may even start my own group fashioned after MADD, Mothers Against Drunk Driving, but I'll call it AWLTDASH, Alcoholics Who Like to Drink and Stay Home.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

Right," Sadie said. "And Set will just stand there calmly while I read him to death.

Right," Sadie said. "And Set will just stand there calmly while I read him to death.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

He looks like a runway model. How in the world am I going to be able to reject that? The world is so unfair. Seriously, it's like turning Brad Pitt down for a date. The girl who could actually do it should win an award for idiot of the century.

He looks like a runway model. How in the world am I going to be able to reject that? The world is so unfair. Seriously, it's like turning Brad Pitt down for a date. The girl who could actually do it should win an award for idiot of the century.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

She craved a tall glass of the fresh-squeezed lemonade from the pitcher she’d left chilling in the fridge. Two glasses served with a generous slice of pound cake with orange glaze icing sounded twice as nice.

She craved a tall glass of the fresh-squeezed lemonade from the pitcher she’d left chilling in the fridge. Two glasses served with a generous slice of pound cake with orange glaze icing sounded twice as nice.

Nov 24, 2024 - Fabian Biese>

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